[Barry]

and thought I'd share them here:

So a little girl's in the shower with her mom, washer her hair and whatnot. The little girl looks up, and asks, "Hey mom, what're those?"
Mom says, "Oh, those are my tits."
Little girl asks, "When do I get them?"
Mom answers, "When you're older."

Next day little girl's in the shower again, this time with her dad. Little girl turns around and asks, "Hey dad, what's that?"
Dad: "Oh, that's my cock."
Little Girl: "Well, when do I get one?"
Dad: "When your mom leaves for work."



A Russian, an American, and an Iraqi walk into a bar. They're all armed. After a few drinks, the Russian picks up a bottle of vodka, says "We have too many of these in my country," and shoots it. The American picks up a bottle of beer, says "We have too many of these in my country," and shoots it. The Iraqi picks up the American, says "We have too many of these in my country. ALLAHU ACKBAR!" and blows the himself up.



Definition of optimist:
An Ethiopian dressed for dinner.



Why cant stevie wonder read??
Because he's black



How do you know you're at a gay picnic?
All the hotdogs taste like shit.



Why can't Jesus eat skittles?
Because of the holes in his hands.



What's black, white, and covered in flies?
A dead baby in a newspaper.



How do you make copper wire?
Throw a penny between two jews.



How did Helen Keller burn her face?
Answering the iron.



What do you call a skydiving mexican?
Air pollution.


What's black and white and can't fit through the revolving door?
Nun with a spear stuck through her.